I am bored with the status quo, conformity and the need for social acceptance or peer approval. I don’t need a luxury car, designer bag, hairdo, key card, t-shirt, tattoo, password, company baseball cap or diamond ring to measure my worth or claim my status within society. I live to the beat of my own drums and have so far enjoyed an amazing journey. A life composed of dignity, self respect and love, I could be a civilization unto myself, self confirmed and comfortable without the desire or need for approval from the John or Jane Doe’s of the world.
I haven’t tried to be down with the click since 1983 when I wasn’t invited to the Cabbage Patch Doll sleep over. My family couldn’t afford the seventy-five dollar toy. No doll, no invitation bitch, was the sentiment. Once the tears dried it’s been free thinking ever since – my self value is not determined to material wealth or peer acceptance.
Although, now instead of Cabbage Patch dolls it’s whether or not I have kids, am married, work out at the right gym, work for the right company, wear the right labels or am seen at the right events and the list goes one depending on the click in question.
Don’t get me wrong nice things are nice. Wealth is deserved if it is yours. But wealthy or not, material stuff does not mean one possesses true character or integrity. If you want to live behind the façade of the material, exclusivity, or class that’s fine, do what you want to do. But don’t pester me for not trying to be down with you. I have neither the time or interest to validate you.
My high self esteem makes you uncomfortable but really that’s your problem, not mine. Don’t attempt to force a section of your suffocating pillow over my face. I am not missing a pillow or a mask. I choose to live and breathe freely, without any desire to hide behind the fascia of what makes you comfortable. What happened to the old New York saying, “Do you and I’ll do me?”
I enjoy great wine, good food, the ballet, traveling, classical music, rap, football and other wonderful things but I am not in a contest with anyone. I’m happy when friends, family and people in general are successful and achieve their goals. It is a reflection on all of us, of who we are and the times we live in.
The more insecure conformers I run into who front like that’s not what they are, the more I feel as if I am surrounded by a mass of mad lunatics, or as one friend puts it “the zombies.” I crack my side laughing every time and I am reminded that I am not completely out of my mind.
So, I will continue to live free, think free, love free and give free while maintaining who I am and what I am without concession. And for the blinded that, although blessed with sight, can’t see anything outside of their own little land of make believe, better them than me!
Say What?!