On the A Train

The cool stone bottom brushes my brown skin, its coarse texture scraping the soft flesh. The pain comforting as I submerge deeper. I hold my breath, the feeling heightens. I spread my wings as feathers fall away, the bottom too coarse for their delicate nature. It’s my stop, the A train to High Street. I float down the sunny Brooklyn sidewalk to a place unknown. People mill around me, others walk with determination. They have someplace to be. Right now. Actually, yesterday. It’s New York. Everyone, everything is late. Always. Rush to get there. It was due yesterday, five minutes ago, a second ago.

A movie with a view. The Statue of Liberty stands in the background. Her arms tired from holding that goddamn torch. Stuck in the middle of nowhere surrounded by everywhere as others look to her for something she can’t give. Never could. Never will.

A picnic. Food. Laughter. Wine. Red please. I don’t care for White. Three yellow plastic cups later I’m high as I float across the cold wet grass, contented with the unyielding pain. The crude bottom ripping, scraping at my delicacies tickles my fancy. I could have sex right now. [...]

Ode to the Modern Day Spinster

Years ago a single woman past twenty-five was surely on her way to spinsterhood. By thirty what upstanding man would have anything to do with her? These days women have worked to loosen those pressures but to what avail? We can work and take care of ourselves easily without the support of a man. But if the natural instinct to cuddle up with someone kicks in the obstacle of finding a decent loyal guy to snuggle up beside you is like mission impossible.

In the past six months I’ve had The Fade pulled on me and not by some three or four month fling. I’ve known the guy over a decade and we’d been hanging out seven months before The Fade move. And it wasn’t even a fade. It was more of a “not speaking to me anymore type thing” with no explanation. No argument. No conversation. Just cut off.

Hurt, I meditated and fasted to get over my pain and availed to keep my head up. I met a new guy who seemed super interested and took my time to get to know him. One month in though I came to realize he was looking for someone to pay his bills. I’m not an ATM. [...]

These Cowardly Lions are in Need of a Heart

In a recent conversation with friends we got to talking about men and women here in New York City. I freely admitted that many New York women are aggressive and hostile. From those low calorie diets and long hours in the office coupled with the need to control everything in their lives, including their men, New York women can be quite off putting if not downright offensive sometimes.

The worse of it all is these women take this aggressiveness as a badge of honor of what it means to be a New York woman. Sorry, I’ll pass. Witty, smart, fire cracker, beautiful, alluring, sexy and independent does not mean grabbing every guy by the balls and twisting them off his body. [...]

I’d Like to Return This Cookie Cutter. No, I Don’t Have a Receipt!

I’m sitting on the M2 express bus this afternoon as the driver expertly dips in and out of rush hour traffic on Madison Avenue. The air conditioning blows throughout the bus full throttle creating a moving refrigerator. So cold in fact one needs a sweater, but no one complains as the alternative is the hot and muggy temps outside.

I got on the bus early so I got a window seat far enough back that I wouldn’t have to worry about giving my seat up to the elderly, handicap or pregnant. Not that I mind but hey if I can keep my seat without guilt, I prefer that option. With my IPod crooning old school Usher into my ears and the bus too packed to back seat drive I look out of the window. Block after block I see men and women leaving work and rushing down the street. At first I didn’t notice it but then after a few blocks it was impossible not to see how much everyone looked the same. The men were all wearing dark or khaki colored pants with blue, white or light pink button down oxford shirts. [...]